Q for question, Q for quest

What do you want to become in your life? The answer to this question changed with my age. It was an astronaut when I was a kid. It was a news reporter in my tenth standard. It was to become an anchor for a few days. Sometimes, a full time work in a chocolate factory even without being paid. With the growing age, maturity grows. That stage came to answer to this question seriously. Because we were reaching the end of the final semester and it was mandatory to put my thoughts on paper. Because it was mandatory to attend the campus recruitment coaching classes in college. I was told to close my eyes and imagine myself after 2 years. I saw nothing but a posh building with mirrors all over and me standing on the corridor enjoying my own company. I was fascinated by that picture. I opened my eyes with a lot of enthusiasm and wrote ‘I wanna become a software engineer’.  My pen does not want to stop there because I had a whole lot of thoughts running through my head with the inspiration of that just one picture.

I draw a flowchart of my future plans. It started with a job by the end of the final semester, then MBA after 2 years, then my own business ‘because like the picture, I was so passionate about business though I did not know ABC of business’ and it ended with a picture of me writing a novel sitting on a swing chair in my garden beside my own white house. The moment I was done with the flowchart which ended after two pages from where it started, I closed my book as I had drawn a map to a big treasure. Because I know if I disclose that to anyone, I would responsible for their eyebrow to be lifted. I literally did not want to do that.

It’s been more than two years for my artwork on paper. And yes, I am now standing in the corridor of that lavish building with mirrors but thinking ‘what am I doing with my life?’  ‘Am I going on the right path?’ ‘Is it what I want in my life?’ ‘What do I want actually?’ ‘Am I over thinking on my life?’ ‘Is it me alone struggling with lot such questions?’ because I see everyone satisfied with what they are doing or at least they look satisfying. But then I heard lot of stories from many people who want to do something but doing the other. Is it?